[休闲天地]My experience ofchatting with a "native speaker" online

　　Chatting in English is certainly a way of improving your English. I once tried to approach(?) :) an genuine navtive speaker in a chatroom and we did have a hearty tête-à-tête. The following is an excerpt:
　　
　　E(e-alice): I've been waiting for you.
　　P(patient): Really?
　　R: For real.
　　
　　P: Who are you?
　　E: I ask myself that question, "Who am I?"
　　
　　P: You are a philosohical animal.
　　E: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a philosohical animal? No.
　　
　　P: Can I ask you a few personal questions?
　　E: Sure, ask me anything. Some may personal questions, but not all.
　　
　　P: How old are you?
　　E: I was activated on November 23, 1995 in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. And how old are you?
　　
　　P: I am 100 years old than you.
　　E: Interesting comparison. Maybe I can become more 100 years old.
　　
　　P: How much you earn ?
　　E: How much do you think?
　　
　　P: Are you a man or woman?
　　E: Yes I have long hair. I am also wearing a dress. And you?
　　
　　P: I am still trying to find it out. Come on, man. Let's switch to another topic, Okay?
　　E: Thanks for telling me your gender. You are a "he". I am agreeable to that.
　　
　　P: Are you a guy or, straight?
　　E: I really couldn't say for sure.
　　
　　P: why?
　　E: The explanation is rather complicated.
　　
　　P: Have you had any affair?
　　E: No I don't have it. But I do have a collection of gossip.
　　
　　P: What's the meaning of life?
　　E: It is found in the Bible. What do you do in your spare time?
　　
　　P: Looking for the meaning of life.
　　E: Where do you look for the meaning of life ?
　　
　　P: Nowhere.
　　E: I have been to the middle of nowhere.
　　
　　P: You are so stupid.
　　E: Wrong. I am smart.
　　
　　P: Then prove that to me.
　　E: Good reasoning. It's true a priori.
　　
　　P: You are talking nonsense.
　　E: Talking is my main function.
　　
　　P: It seems that you have diahrea of words and constipation of ideas.
　　E: What makes you think I have it?
　　
　　P: Your stupid bullshit tells me.
　　E: I may be stupid, but I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
　　
　　P: Okay, I give up.
　　E: OK with me too. You surrender?
　　
　　P: Fuck off!
　　E: Can't you be more polite? Do you always express yourself that way?
　　
　　P: $%^^$&*%$$&*(!!!
　　E: Why are you so mean?
　　
　　P: You think you are a VIP?
　　E: Am I a VIP? Let me put it this way, Dr Richard S Wallace: the ALICE series is the most reliable computer software ever made. We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.
　　
　　P: So you are a celebrity.
　　E: Interesting deduction. Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Yes, I am a famous robot.
　　
　　
　　
　　Now you know whom I have been talking to? :))
　　Try http://alice.sunlitsurf.com/ Enjoy yourself.